Quiz: How Shame Resilient Are You?

HOW SHAME RESILIENT ARE YOU?

More often than not, chronic shame is a completely unconscious and suppressed feeling. The effects, however, can be far reaching and do not only corrupt our social interactions, but also our health. Find out how much of a personal risk you have.

LET'S GO!

HOW SHAME RESILIENT ARE YOU?

LET'S GO!

1/13

How would you describe your social life?*

I prefer to be alone - I feel safer that way.

I occasionally avoid social interactions.

I truly enjoy both social activities and alone-time.

How do you deal with eye contact?*

I'm avoiding it at all cost.

I can do it for a while, but then it becomes uncomfortable (even with closer friends or family)

I love eye contact and am actively looking for it.

As a child, how have you experienced your parents or caregivers?*

Cold and unloving or hard to reach

Sometimes loving and caring, sometimes cold, rejecting or erratic.

Loving, understanding, supportive, reliable

How would you describe your self worth?*

I've got serious self worth issues.

It depends. Sometimes I feel confident and strong, other times I feel a nagging sense of self doubt.

I've got a solid feeling of self worth.

How do you deal with your needs?

I often don't know what I need and rarely ask for something.

Sometimes, I know what I need. Other times, I don't. I try to ask for what I need, even if I feel not entirely comfortable with it.

I know my needs and know how to get them fulfilled.

I am very self sufficient and don't need anything from others.

How would you describe the relationship with your body?*

We're best friends and a great team. I always pay attention to what it says.

I dislike or mistrust my body, and I don't feel I can rely on it. If I get physical sensations, I try to ignore, numb or avoid them.

Overall, I like my body. However, there are some things I'd prefer to be different.

I love my body, but I can still learn to listen to it better.

Have you ever experienced trauma, violence, neglect or abuse?*

Yes, several times or for an extended period of time

Yes, once. But I feel it is not affecting my life (any more).

No, I've never experienced anything like that. However, If I witness it in others, I really feel for them. This must be so painful.

Yes, once, and it still haunts me.

How healthy would you say you are (physically, emotionally and mentally)?*

Very healthy (either because I've not had many issues or because I've done much healing)

Mostly healthy. I know I've got some weak points, but I either have good coping strategies or am working on improving them.

My health is poor, and sometimes I don't know where to start when it comes to getting better.

How do you react if someone publicly criticises, belittles or humiliates you?*

I feel horrible, tend to become speechless, want to disappear and can't think straight any more.

I feel hurt, but try to stand my ground and reject what feels like an unjust treatment.

I'm aware that this says more about their wounds than about me. This is why I don't take it personal. However, I might choose to address their behaviour in a clear and calm way.

How do you handle mistakes?*

I see them as an opportunity for growth and learning. I'm curious about what happened, notice what went wrong and make it better next time.

I hate mistakes, both in myself and others. If I make one, I feel bad and try to hide or repair it as fast and inconspicuously as I can.

I feel slightly embarrassed when I make a mistake, but can recover from it rather quickly. I fix it and/or apologise and then move on.

How do you feel about being visible - privately, job related or publicly?*

I don't like to be seen at all. It makes me anxious and/or uncomfortable.

It depends on the environment and whether it feels friendly or "hostile". Most of the time, I choose what I show to others.

I feel good about myself, no matter what others see in me. I accept their perspective as something I can't control. I can only control how I look at myself.

I love audience and thrive on applause. It makes me feel great, and I'm trying to get as much attention as possible.

How often do you experience embarrassment, blushing or self-consciousness?*

Often, even for minor issues.

Sometimes, when there's a good reason.

Not so often. However, when it happens I'm very aware of my feelings.

Never

ONE MORE STEP ...

Where can we email you the results? Please enter details below.

I'd like to learn more about shame resilience. Please send me your newsletter.

Once in a while, we'll inform you about new blog articles, online courses, freebies, events and other services. You may withdraw your consent at any time, for which any notice to us, without any formal requirement, is sufficient (e.g. through the contact form, by e-mail or through the link to unsubscribe in each e-mail). The information you've given will be sent to my marketing platform Sendinblue in accordance with their Terms of Use.

Privacy Declaration – Legal Notice

1/13

How would you describe your social life?*

I prefer to be alone - I feel safer that way.

I occasionally avoid social interactions.

I truly enjoy both social activities and alone-time.

How do you deal with eye contact?*

I'm avoiding it at all cost.

I can do it for a while, but then it becomes uncomfortable (even with closer friends or family)

I love eye contact and am actively looking for it.

As a child, how have you experienced your parents or caregivers?*

Cold and unloving or hard to reach

Sometimes loving and caring, sometimes cold, rejecting or erratic.

Loving, understanding, supportive, reliable

How would you describe your self worth?*

I hate to admit it, but I've got serious self worth issues.

It depends. Sometimes I feel confident and strong, other times I feel a nagging sense of self doubt.

I've got a solid feeling of self worth.

How do you deal with your needs?*

I often don't know what I need and rarely ask for something.

Sometimes, I know what I need. Other times, I don't. I try to ask for what I need, even if I feel not entirely comfortable with it.

I know my needs and know how to get them fulfilled.

I am very self sufficient and don't need anything from others.

How would you describe the relationship with your body?*

We're best friends and a great team. I always pay attention to what it has to say.

I dislike or mistrust my body and don't feel I can rely on it. If I get physical sensations, I try to ignore, numb or avoid them.

Overall, I like my body. However, there are some things I'd prefer to be different.

I love my body, but I can still learn to listen to it better.

Have you ever experienced trauma, violence, neglect or abuse?*

Yes, several times or for an extended period of time

Yes, once. But I feel it is not affecting my life (any more).

No, I've never experienced anything like that. However, If I witness it in others, I really feel for them. This must be so painful.

Yes, once, and it still haunts me.

How healthy would you say you are (physically, emotionally and mentally)?*

Very healthy (either because I've not had many issues or because I've done much healing)

Mostly healthy. I know I've got some weak points, but I either have good coping strategies or am working on improving them.

My health is poor, and sometimes I don't know where to start when it comes to getting better.

How do you react if someone criticises, belittles or humiliates you?*

I feel horrible, tend to lose my speech, want to disappear or hide and can't think straight any more.

I feel hurt, but try to stand my ground and reject what feels like an unjust treatment.

I'm aware that this says more about their wounds than about me. This is why I don't take it personal. I might address their behaviour in a clear and calm way.

How do you handle mistakes?*

I see them as an opportunity for learning. I'm curious about what happened, notice what went wrong and make it better next time.

I hate mistakes, both in myself and others. If I make one, I feel bad and try to hide or repair it as fast and inconspicuously as I can.

I feel slightly embarrassed when I make a mistake, but can recover from it rather quickly. I fix it and/or apologise and then move on.

How do you feel about being visible – privately, job related or publicly?*

I don't like to be seen at all. It makes me anxious and/or uncomfortable.

It depends on the environment (whether it feels friendly or "hostile"). Mostly, I choose what I show to others.

I am comfortable being seen. I can't control other people's perspective, only how I feel about myself.

I love audience and thrive on applause. I try to get as much attention as possible.

How often do you experience embarrassment, blushing or self-consciousness?*

Often, even for minor issues.

Sometimes, when there's a good reason.

Not so often. However, when it happens I'm very aware of my feelings.

Never

ONE MORE STEP ...

Where can we email you the results?

I'd like to learn more about shame resilience. Please send me your newsletter.

Occasionally, we'll inform you about new blog articles, online courses, events and other services. You may withdraw your consent at any time, for which any notice to us, without any formal requirement, is sufficient (e.g. by email, through the contact form or the unsubscribe link in each email). The information you've given will be sent to our marketing platform Sendinblue in accordance with their Terms of Use.

Privacy Declaration – Legal Notice

0-2 Points You're equipped with an exceptionally strong shame resilience, a good sense of self and healthy boundaries. You've either had a very nurturing upbringing or have done an amazing job of healing yourself. Know that your presence is a blessing for all of us (and particularly deeply wounded people). Your awareness and balance are remarkable and not easy to find (...)

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE QUIZ!

YOU SCORED

0/0

If you've signed up for the newsletter, please also check your mailbox.

Click here for the full report

You scored

0/0

READ FULL REPORT

If you've signed up for the newsletter, please check your mailbox.

3-12 Points Overall, you're a pretty balanced person. You seem to know your strengths and have probably found ways of handling your weaknesses. Most people will consider you self-confident and strong, and yet you know that underneath, there are still some old, uncomfortably sensitive wounds (...)

Click here for the full report

If you've signed up for the newsletter, please also check your mailbox.

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE QUIZ!

YOU SCORED

0/0

If you've signed up for our newsletter, please also check your inbox!

READ FULL REPORT

You scored

0/0

If you've signed up for the newsletter, please check your mailbox.

13-36 Points You probably have several wounds that could be shame related. The higher your score, the more difficult experiences you've probably accumulated. But fear not! While this can stem from deeper trauma, ongoing criticism and bullying, many people also go through smaller, less “dramatic” experiences (like deception, rejection or feeling misunderstood) that we usually don't account for our troubles, but can add up over time and corrode our sense of self (...)